Hello World :)

How has everyone been? I know that I haven't been writing much and for that I do apologize. I have been doing a lot of self neglect, and putting the world in front of me. I realized that recently and did quite a bit of self reflection. One of the biggest things I found that helped me, was creating this site and posting my first two blogs. It brought me a lot of peace and joy to be able to share with all of you. All of that aside, this piece will probably be a shorter one. However, I am going to make it a point of posting more and being here with everyone more.

My life has been turned upside down this year. Covid changed everything. It hit my mental health and took its toll without me even realizing what it was doing right away. I learned a few years back that I am an empath. I made it to the age of 25 without realizing what I was feeling and what I was doing in this world. I was just starting to get the hang of what I was always feeling. I was getting a control of me, and my immediate world around me. Right as I thought I was okay, Covid happened and the chaos of everyone's feelings drug me down deep. I didn't realize I was in a dark place to begin with. I honestly didn't realize it until a few months ago.

Once I realized that, it took me a bit to be willing to admit I couldn't handle it while doing nothing. I thought if I ignored everything, that I would feel better and regain the control I lost. But that isn't true. I had to do something. That something for me, is writing and sharing with everyone.

I truly believe that if I share my story, and I can reach at least one person, maybe, just maybe it will all be worth it. All the pain, and all the struggles may be worth it if I can help one person feel worth it in their lives.

Don't get me wrong. A lot of good has happened in my life. A lot of good has happened this year. I realized that a person I didn't think would become a good friend, has become more of sister to me. She has been there to help pick me up when I fall. My wife has been a bit unstable as she works on herself, and I haven't wanted to add to her, as she works on herself. My new friend has helped me before I even realized she was helping me.

My wife and I have shared some new fun experiences this year. She has made great progress on the journey she has started. I am so proud of her, and watching as she grows, makes me want to better myself as well. We just got a new kitten as a friend for our cat. They took a bit of time to warm up to each other, however, they are quickly becoming best friends.

My life is full of joy. But sometimes it is hard to focus on all of that. And that is perfectly okay. It is okay to struggle. It is okay to fall. It is okay to not be able to focus on the joy. But when you find yourself in those moments, and you've allowed yourself some time to cry, find what balances you, and balance yourself again.

For some people, that is running, others it is reading. For me it is writing and sharing my life. I've learned that sharing gets it off my chest.

As my page grows, I may open an open forum for everyone to post on. If it is something that everyone would like, please message me. If anyone ever needs to talk, message me. I am here for each and everyone of you.

You are all beautiful inside and out.